A german shepherd cross is NOT a lap dog. For a dog who can't climb into my car you are sure persistent and successful at clambering up onto my lap. And by the way, the cost of the drycleaning to remove the coffee stains from my dress pants will be coming out of your treat allowance.
When I get home from work at 5:30, it is TOO DARK to go for a walk in the pasture. Standing at the pasture gate wuffing continuously for 15 minutes will not change my mind.
Our house is 600 square feet. You do not have to walk beside me every step of the way every time I move from one room to another. I will not get lost.
Carpet cleaners are more effective than a dog's tongue for picking up whatever it is that you find so fascinating on our carpet. And while we're on the topic.....could you wash your paws and the floor a little less noisily????
When you lie right across my bedroom door, you have to expect to be tripped over when I get up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom. I'm half asleep during the day - and you expect me to be alert at three AM???
When it is pouring rain, windy, or freezing cold, I do not feel kindly toward you when you stand in the back door for twenty minutes, half in and half out, making up your mind about where you'd like to be. And unless someone has some more liver bars for sale, I will no longer be bribing you to come in with those - ordinary store bought treats will have to suffice.
The cat is not a plaything. Especially in the middle of the night.
[Needless to say, Isaac seems to have fully recovered from my failed attempt to integrate Thomas into our home. In fact, he has rediscovered his Inner Pup. Anyone want a big, klutzy, clingy, funny, old, crippled German Shepherd cross?].