if we are re-writing other people's stories...here is mine

the rescuer arrives at the rainbow bridge.

most people have seen the rescue version of the rainbow bridge story. the rescuer arrives at the bridge in glowing white and the animals bow their heads in respect as she passes. (it is always a she)....ok...so here is my version.

the dogs are all playing or sleeping or rolling around in the grass, happily hanging out at the rainbow bridge, when all of a sudden a figure appears, proudly glowing in shining white right in the middle of the bridge.

the fat little beagle spies her first and screams "LOOK EVERYONE, THERE SHE IS!!!" and they rush her, and knock her down and soon she is no where in sight. ever so slowly a torn, filthy creature crawls out from the pile and sneaks back the way that she came. and soon the dogs realize their friend is gone and go back to doing not much of anything except watching and waiting.

it starts to get dark and the animals are sleeping when a torn and dirty figure appears, she sneaks to the edge of the rainbow bridge and slyly starts crossing underneath. but the beagle is awake and he knows all her tricks so he quietly alerts the crowd..."hey she is back and she is trying to outsmart us again, she is sneaking under the bridge" so they all rush forward again but this time the figure is faster. she runs back to the bush on the far side of the bridge and hides back inside their depths. and she waits a really long time. she sees others arrive at the bridge and greet their friends and walk happily off into the distance. and she ponders how to out smart a fat beagle when she doesn't have access to a fridge. she is cold and wet and dirty, and she just wants to get to the other side so she can have a hot bath and soak for a few decades in peace.

and finally she decides, as hard as it is, she is just going to have to be quicker than they. so she hikes up her robes (or what is left of them) and boots it as fast as she can. she is past the dogs before they even knew she was there and when the beagle screamed.."CRAP!!! THERE SHE GOES!!!" " LET"S GO GUYS WE ARE GOING FOR ANOTHER RUN!" they all took off real quick. but the rescuer had a good start. and the last that we saw of that rescuer was her dirty torn self running across those beautiful green fields as fast as she could with a thousand joyful shreaking dogs hot in pursuit.

i think rescuers should be airlifted right past that bridge.