there are things i don't want to tell you because i just don't want them to be real.
Carol · Sep. 15, 2009
marty was rushed to the vet yesterday, his leg was swollen. he had an appointment for tomorrow to look at those small skin tumours, one of which had broken open. the vet felt they were fibrosarcomas, localized malignant tumours...very slow growing and not likely to spread anywhere. the swelling she thought was from blocked lymph nodes because some of the tumours were in the same region. she felt if we took the leg off, marty could have a good quality of life so i booked him in for surgery today..but only for lump removals because we wanted to see the pathology first. the vet just called. marty will not be having surgery, his lungs are full of cancer.
he is still feeling ok so he is coming home til it is time to help him go.
the ferrier just left. she said gideon is getting close. he is weaker than he was 6 weeks ago. he was having a hard time during the hoof trims. but true to gideon's spirit, he charged past us at a full trot to the field, glad to be done. she laughed and said ok gideon, just prove me wrong. still...we know his time is getting closer, so we watch and wait.
spritely did not have her feet done. the ferrier would not touch her today. she said that hoof is ready to separate.....her miracles have all gone away. i called the vet and had the vet call the ferrier to talk about her. he called me back and said in the best interests for spritely, it is time to help her go before the big crises hits.
so....our beloved spritely sprocket spirit train will be leaving us this friday. the vets will make the arrangements, her very best human friends have been notified.
i don't know how i am going to do this. so many last minute miracles, so many times she made it thru. why does this have to be the last one...why can there be no miracle again for her?
i looked into her liquid brown eyes, i ran my hands along her glistening coat. i breathed deeply in the warm smell of her, felt the beauty of her deep within my soul.
this is going to be so hard.