i think we live in a society of such great untruth now
Carol · Aug. 11, 2010
that we just expect things not to be true.
sorry..crazy does take time to dissipate.
liar, liar. pants on fire...except our pants are flame retardent now.
i so want rescue to be about animals...but the reality is...it is not. it is about people...you, me, the guy across the street and down the road.
medical care is kind of the same thing....we assume if we are sick, we will be taken care of...maybe...maybe not. every year, i see more of the maybe nots but that is not what the governments and insurence company's will tell you. they will tell you, you are in very good hands.
some truths are personal....william did not want me to say that there were too many animals here because i said that...he did not really want to know how we got a kennel licence because i said that too. he wanted everyone of us to feel the same as what he felt on his one visit here...uncomfortable.
that hurtful blog that was written about me...was not even really about me..it was about how someone else felt inside, about what someone else believed.
truth is a tricky thing because as humans we can and do twist it to suit our needs...we learn this in infancy. truth is only true to us if we can get someone else to believe us.
so where does that put me?
i don't know. i find this so confusing. where do i put myself on the spectrum of human truthful living?
i think for those of us who do really want to be truthful beings...we struggle. we consider not just others but ourselves too.
but it is the others who so affect me. when i close the doors here at night and it is just me and the animals..i am so comfortable here. i am so at ease with the truth about them and me, i feel good when i look around me. it is when the doors open each day again that i lose this comfort of true belief.
nurses do...we look upon suffering and we try to sooth it away with our hands and with the tools available to us. that is my truth. at night when i see the animals on clean beds or clean floors, stretched out and sleeping peacefully with full food and water bowls within easy reach,,with soft bodies that are pain and fear free...i feel like i did when i did rounds at midnight with my human wards...a sense of rightness..they are all well, their minds, bodies and spirits are at ease at this moment...it feels good. this truly affects me personally.
i don't know if i can, or even should try to question this, to try to remake saints into something different than it already is, something that more humans are comfortable with.
the problem with slipping over into crazy sometimes, is things sometimes feel clearer but are harder to really see.