wishing for a world of super human marigolds sometimes.

one day i would like to finish off the petfinder contest in the top 25 over all...why? i am not sure...because we haven't yet? because of my personal ego? because i want people to know of and care about the animals here?
probably a combination of all three.
anyway..the final standings only count if we stick by the rules so that is why i ask everyone to respect the one vote per person per day rule.

and i do understand what everyone keeps saying to me...that folks sometimes get uncomfortable when i write about the not so nice, driving me crazy rescue things...maybe they won't want to vote for us..maybe they won't want to support us either...maybe the reality is more than folks really want to read about.

and that confuses me.

i always want to do what is best for saints and the animals here...and i do always want to put their needs first in all things.
but i don't want to sacrifice my personal sense of integrity...i said i would share the nice, the bright, the shining and good but also the not so great things that happen here too.

and i do know my main motivations for doing this...

1. if rescue is hard and dirty..(physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally,) and sucks here some days...then if it is sucking the same for someone else in rescue somewhere else...it doesn't mean that they are horrible or terrible or not good at what they do..it just means that on some days...all rescue sucks.

2. if rescuing animals depends on people to do it..then those same people do not have to be perfect or angels or saints to actually do it.

3. i would feel like i was disrespecting the lives of the animals here if all i told was the good things and made the not so nice things disappear.

4. and finally, realistically...there is absolutely no point in lying or pretending around here...there are just too many people in and out every day to hide anything anyway.

what i would like to happen one day for sure...is for someone (s), to take over saints who are so good in all things (not perfect, but pretty freaking amazing, together and smart) that none of the not so nice things ever get a chance to occur cuz they are right on top of the ball..they know what to do, and when to do it and how to do it and actually get it done really well..... that would be what is best for saints and the animals in the long and short run.

of course once that happens, motivations one and two will be shit out of luck cuz what is not happening at this rescue may still be happening to you and that will still suck..

so anyway...that is why i write some of this shit now....because it does happen...not so nice people with axes to grind...maggots and flies....animals not happy when they first arrive...animals whose issues cannot be managed by me, pain in the ass animals who can be managed but are not much fun, twisted senses of humour, some common sense....urine and feces and blood, sweat and tears.....lunacy, sainthood, and everything in between.

i know it sometimes seems like a soap opera...and really it is because life is sometimes a soap opera when you are actually living it this close to the edge of the cliff.

anyway..i don't think i can stop sharing the real and proverbial maggots in rescue and just put out the pretty flowers and air freshners cuz that does animals or people no favor anywhere...altho..it may actually increase support and donations for us personally...but maybe not fairly.

sigh...i think what we do really need is a world where flies and maggots are extinct.

why are all insect murdering sprays so toxic anyway...even the safe, toxic free, marigold stuff i bought is just a somewhat effective (but not really) repellant...sadly it doesn't actually knock anyone off....and knocking them off is my real, not so nice, goal around here...cuz even if we repel them....they just keep coming back, over and over....fly season is fly season..it happens every time the temperature rises, the flies start breeding again....and that does put our less then perfect and somewhat defective lives here at risk.

lucky is sore today...her skin is burning, her butt is on fire...she has had her shower, skin care, and pain meds, (thank you renee) and now i better go give her, her flagyl and breakfast too.

guess it is time to quit writing and start moving..afternoon shifts make me lazy.