xray vision right into my malfunctioning head.
Carol · May 17, 2013
it wasn't a super sleep but it was a better sleep....today is the last of my early shifts, tomorrow I go back to just a regular day...alarm change to 6 am instead, yay.
I was pretty damn lazy on my last set of days off...didn't get anything extra done that I didn't absolutely have to do. I will try to do much better this week or we will totally be screwed. that open house to do list is patiently waiting for me to get to. I did do the first spackling coat on some of the walls. pretty sure it is dry enough a whole freaking week later to continue to fill some of the bangs, nicks and holes. that should have all been done and sanded and ready for paint within 2 or 3 days...it so sucks to be lazy!
that is the trouble with some place like saints...it is the real life actions... not just the helpful, "sounds like a great idea" thought that counts. I am well aware I am the procrastinator extraordinaire..i can think of all kinds of really nice shit to do to make saints look better...the question becomes will I actually do what I said I could do?
it not only sucks to be lazy..it sucks to procrastinate too!
it is one thing to be lazy and keep ones mind and intentions free of endless lists to do, but once i say it or write it down on paper...it becomes something that I am now freaking honor bound to do.
I should really just learn to shut up and keep this mind a total blank about things I think I can and might just possibly, one day, get around to.
so much guilt and time wasted formulating reasonably logical excuses on why I DIDN'T do what I said I would do.
why oh why can't I be a real live super action hero instead of a make believe wonder woman whose super powers only lives in her head????
if you ask me...it actually sucks to be somewhat insightful too.
my head might be the real thing that needs a deep cleaning/de-junking..i just need to get in there and start sorting and doing til it is empty again.
then hopefully then I can keep it like that.
that sounds like a truly brilliant idea....I better add it to my list.