both zsu zsu and river were euthanized today.

zsu zsu suddenly crashed...well maybe not all that suddenly..i noticed a couple of odd things she was doing on the weekend. in any case this morning she took a major tumble down the end of life road. zsu zsu was a VERY strong and determined cat and at almost 19, blind, deaf and with major arthritic issues, she kept trucking along for all she was worth. I am really going to miss the messiest cat in the whole freaking world..she made me smile every single day.

the vet was here this morning and after re-checking river, we came to the conclusion that we really were not able to restore him to any reasonable level of wellness. I asked about de-clawing him as a very last option since we just could not get that infection out of the bones in his toes. the vet said it was not a good idea, given the level of infection, the amputated toes would probably not heal. we have been trying many, many things with river to help him feel well. the best we got was to keep him reasonably comfortable with a bunch of narcotics but we couldn't fix the underlaying problems.
it is cats like river that I always feel so bad for at the end of their lives. he was a really nice cat and he had a huge and sweet tempered spark for life. we tried keeping hope floating waiting for that miracle day when he could feel well and not be in pain every day but it never came.
I will miss his so affectionate greeting each evening when I came to feed and settle him to bed. I wish his life had been better, he deserved it, he was such a gracious cat.

rest in peace zsu zsu and river and I hope where ever you both are now, you are feeling much better.
love you guys.