it was as I feared an advanced lymphoma affecting all of his lymph nodes. the vet offered the available options including chemotherapy...but it would have been a really bad idea to try that on an ancient, blind, deaf and demented little sweet dog. I was already having issues with the quality of pepper's recent life, I wasn't going to add another huge challenge. the only other real option was wait and see how he progressed..he might have a couple of days or up to a couple of weeks left. but he would still need his daily baths due to his bad skin which terrified him, he would need to be put back in the car and taken back to the vets for euthanization when he did hit the end and that too totally terrified him.
luckily today I had renee with me in the car to manage him but he still pooped and peed and frequently screamed, it was truly upsetting for him.
once he got into the exam room and could toddle around freely again, he calmed down. but I didn't want to put him thru another moment of upset if there was no hope that he would be able to get well.
pepper was another of the most vulnerable animals here. he desperately needed to be coddled and protected and helped to feel safe, I decided it was best to let this sweet little soul be free.
I love you pepper and I so wish I could have known you when you were young, healthy, and of sound mind. I bet you were an incredible dog. but I am glad all of saints was here to love and care for you when you needed someone the most.
rest in gentle peace, sweet little dog.