my neck is killing me..i either have whip lash from capone yanking me around with his freaking leash or my neck is sore cuz last night I had a crappy sleep. it was a bad dog night. lance did not want to come in, he wanted to sleep in the dog house. that meant I had to leave the door open just in case which meant jake, andy, mystic and june would periodically hear something outside that one of them had to bark about.
up and down, force everyone in including lance, listen to him whine and cry while confined and then give in and open the door til some idiot barked some more.
it was a yo-yo sleep disturbed night.
and this is why I really do not give a shit if I have a bad day or two and look like a bitchy loonie tune on the blog. I have to live my bad days and nights I am not hiding them away pretending I am some super sucker I am not. I earn the right to be a nutbar once in a while when everyone around me is driving me nuts. and I KNOW when things are not going right.
I will tell you why I do not stay totally insane..it is because I know it is not personal. somedays, sometimes, someways, all living beings are somehow fucked up..me, you, them (as in the animals)...it is not personal, it is just how things sometimes are.
one day lance will be easily movable from point A to point B and not have a flipping fit because I need too much from him...like stay where I want him to stay. one day I will have both of those pigs in an inescapable pen that they can not break out of.
the one good thing now tho..is I am no longer wondering if that first fight was a one off and I was keeping them apart unfairly. I was worried that maybe they were suffering from each others loss.
yeah ok...not so. those two pigs for whatever reason are done with each other forever.
it is quite sad really but shit happens to pigs and their relationships too.
heads up for next weekend...I will be busy and not around both Saturday and sunday.... jenns wedding and my family are all coming in. I will run back and forth between family and saints to try to meet my commitments to both. but this is the one time that I regret buying a farm out in mission. it adds even more stress due to traveling time.
anyway...I am not only hoping that the animals behave themselves and do not totally screw that weekend up, but I am also hoping we have enough comfortable volunteer coverage. by that I mean, long term folks who can deal with whatever periodically does go on around here...the weekend will be a disaster if the folks who know shit are not here.
I will be worrying until I see next weekends schedule and who is here and who is not.
tonight is the wedding rehearsal and I have to be in new west by 6 pm. that means bedtime routine has to start at 3 and it also means we absolutely cannot have a repeat gong show bedtime of yesterday AND sorry lance..but you WILL be safely locked in the house until I get home!!!
every rescue day is a new freaking day filled with shit that can go wrong. I would like things to always go perfectly smoothly, I would like nothing to ever go sideways...I would like a couple of million dollars and a twenty year old body too.
whatever, you deal with what you got. but on a bad day...I do hate that freaking gong that goes off every time I screw up or do something wrong.