i was talking to janice yesterday and she was saying how she really thought each year would get easier, and it doesn't. it really is just more of the same. it is so frustrating for people who work with us because we have both been around the block so many times we can just draw the thing out with a crayon.
this has been a challenging few months for me, forget the bathroom and washer disasters, they don't mean anything at all because they are just stuff and they aren't the least bit alive. and even broken ankles do eventually mend. but the people who need something, like solutions to their problems, the animals i have turned away knowing the outcome probably won't be good, and the new one that i know i will take tonight, i just get tired of it all on some days too.
you would think that each day would be different, but there are only so many different scenes and scripts and characters and storylines to go around. and eventually they just start to re-play themselves so many times until you know the ending as soon as the show starts to play. it is so hard not to become cynical in rescue. it is a struggle to maintain hope and faith, i am lucky that i actually get to live with the animals here and work with a truly great group of people who love them as much as i do because they are the ones who make each day something new and fresh and clean. and that is what makes hope and faith float.
still...somedays it seems that saints is just an illusion and really i am living in the heartbreak hotel and we are way over booked and turning more and more away.
Then there are days when you live at the Taj Mahal....like when Ellie rolls over for a belly rub, or Molly does her Pilates routine, or Hannah gets a job and a whole new world opens up to her, or Sadman finds a home, or sweet Dexter acts like a puppy and swims across the pond to fetch a "stick" that weighs more than him, or Percy gets a case of the zoomies.
People have their own agendas, and most have the ability to solve their own problems if only they try. Stuff breaks, but there seems to be almost nothing SAINT Greg can't fix. There will always be more animals than spaces available, and that is the truly heartbreaking thing. The lucky ones make it to your Heartbreak Hotel.