Rescue Journal

the possibilty exists...

Carol  ·  Aug. 21, 2007

that i may be a little bit nutz. so i like to check in once in awhile with those closest to me, this week i checked 3 times, with 3 different people..."am i nutz?"..."well...yeah. a little bit, but in a good kind of way" i guess that is ok,not as good as "no, absolutely not."...but i can live with this.

i also check in about saints..."are we ok still? are the animals still happy and is this still a good place?"...."we are too full, but they are ok still, but no more difficult ones, the mix is getting tough"...ok, this i know and am working on it.

i remember asking one of our vets who hates everyone in rescue except me (most of the time, sometimes he doesn't like me either)...why he didn't like rescue people, he said because they are all lunatics. i asked if they knew they were lunatics and he said no. so i said, well, then i could be a lunatic and not know it too. he laughed and said that i might be mentally ill but i wasn't a lunatic yet. that is a comfort.... i think.

i have been thinking lately about insanity, and stupidity, and innocence. and i think we are innocent of ourselves. sometimes i just stare in utter amazement at some of the stuff that people actually say, where others can actually hear. and i wonder...hmmm? do they know what they just said? " i say some pretty wierd stuff, but i know i am doing it. i am saying what i think at that moment and i know that sometimes people, does she know what she just said? yes, i do...i know that i just told everyone that sometimes i am stupid, and sometimes i am a little bit crazy, and sometimes i am not very nice....i tell you, because it is true and i know it is true.

but it occurs to me, do others know too? or do they get to live in the land of happily, ignorantly, innocence?

so i am asking you know when you are a bit out there and kind of teetering to the edge, or do you think you are always right on and everyone else would agree?

this enquiring mind wants to know, i am on a quest to define my normal. cuz if it is normal to be innocently ignorant, then i want to go there too.


Chris T

We just adopted two more dogs. We must be mental too! I think we are all mental!


I know when I am out there teetering on the edge... it is where I spend most of my life... the one good thing about getting older is... I know longer worry about it as much. Lindsay is right... I think you are in good company.