are you dying?..or are you not?..do the vets love me?.... or do they not?

or could also be entitled..."a 30 minute crises causing heart attack."

i walk in the house a bit late tonight cuz i got tied up at work, and everyone is nutso to see me...screaming and flailing around.

star is almost doing flippy flops to get as close as she can...and there is not a puke in sight until 3 and half minutes later. and then it starts...star is puking out her guts...over and over and over again...no exaggeration, 20 times in 15 minutes. for the seconds in between vomit, she is frantically licking every single inch of the floor and ripping up fiber strings from carpets, cat posts, blankets and trying to swallow those. she even sucked up and puked up a dryer sheet!

HOLY FREAKING MOTHER OF GOD!!!! what is WRONG with her???? gastric torsion from saying too enthusiastic a hello????

i am frantically trying to stop her from vacuuming up every thing not nailed down and at the same time trying to dial our vets pager numbers and get my own return number back in.

dave phoned first, colleen was not far behind..not gastric torsion (remember that was how phil unexpectedly died so i am a bit paranoid of this)...anyway, i learned something which i will pass on to you...

they don't actually puke with a torsion, they just try...and that insane frantic eat and lick everything in sight is classic for acute gastric irritation.

so...do i have both oral and injectible reglan?...why yes i do...give the injectible first, wait 10 minutes and then give the po.

do i have sulcrate?..again, yes i do...wait 10 minutes after the po dose of reglan and then give the sulcrate to her.

soooo...we have had the injectible and the oral reglan, we are waiting the 10 minutes yet to give the sulcrate and star has stopped puking and licking like a maniac..crises in the process of resolving.

she is not dying, the vets are probably torn between loving me or not...yes i did bug them on their pagers but i did not make them come back to their clinics so that ought to count.

jeezus freaking chris-on-a-cross...coming home one day is going to give me a heart attack and i hope my human doctors are as much on the ball as our vets!

thank you dave and colleen..star will try to be good for the rest of tonight.