Rescue Journal

when i fell asleep last night...

Carol  ·  Mar. 18, 2010


suzie was holding me down by the hair trying to lick out my eyes. i kept trying to hide my eyes in her side so she couldn't reach them but then she'd pull a dirty trick..(like sticking her tongue in my ear ) and when i jumped, she'd go for the eyes again. it was gross.

normally she puts herself to sleep by licking chica's eyes but chica was in a killer mood watching kodi over the side of the bed and threatening cattledog murder so suzie decided my eyes were a better alternative for sleep soothing for her.

i did eventually fall asleep and then i had the weirdeset dream...i was walking along a poverty stricken country road and found this ugly black, white, brown but almost hairless dog with a perfectly round head....her head looked like a basket ball...odd. i started asking at farms along the way and finally someone said she was a pig not a dog and she was his cousin's pig but he didn't want her anymore. oh. so i spent like forever trying to loop a leash over her, she was very uncooperative and not very nice either and she was the world's homeliest pig to boot...i felt sorry for her..homely and unwanted...i want you honey.

once i got the leash on her, she turned into my very best friend. it became annoying, this pig was glued to me..every time i moved an inch. she cut me off to anticipate me. i kept tripping over her, i could not get to where ever i was going and i wanted off that lonely dreary road as quick as i could...but...there was this happy, loving, weird looking pig in my way. i really wanted to just let her go again cuz i didn't want her anymore either but i knew it was not allowed and she was very sweet so i continued to try to go somewhere while going really nowhere at all because that pig just kept blocking me.

eventually i woke up and opened my eyes...and there was that perfectly round, weird looking head with her eagerly gleaming, slightly bugging eyes, staring right at me from half an inch away.
jeezus christ suzie...quit freaking tormenting me and following me into my dreams!



Too funny!!! These are the types of things that make us all laugh and should be in your book.

Mauro Salles

A detail => "... chica was in a killer mood watching kodi over the side of the bed ..."


funny ... but frankly a little disturbing. Eyeball licking is gross ...ick. But I still love suzie and you.