Rescue Journal

here is a story i found that i wrote about an old border collie named blue....i only had him for about 6 months before he passed away. this story is from about 12 or 13 years ago.

Carol  ·  Aug. 25, 2011

it is kind of sappy, sorry about that...but it was great to find it and remember holding blue again, he was such a sweet, old dog..

The Silent Song of Blue

I remember a farm with wide-open fields and warm smelling barns. I lived in a stall surrounded by hay and manure. As I grew older, I slept on the porch step outside The Man’s door. Each day I followed him as he did his chores. If I was good, he would give me a rough pat and a kind word. If I was bad, I got a cuff or a kick. For many years our routine never varied. I learned to watch him carefully and not to displease him. I faithfully waited in the dark and in the rain for The Man to come out his door each morning so I could follow in his wake as he moved throughout the farm.

I grew old and I began to feel a deep ache inside my bones. My eyes clouded over and the world became silent. Late one night I awoke frightened. I couldn’t remember where I was and everything looked strange. I went looking for The Man but I couldn’t find him. Soon I was lost, panic-stricken; I wandered the country roads trying to find my way home. Then a different man found me. He put me in his truck and took me to a place with cages full of crying, frightened dogs. I lost myself there. I stood in the corner of the kennel, staring down to the floor, frozen with fear. I waited for many days and nights for The Man to find me and take me home. He never came.

A woman came and put me into her car. She took me to a different place and left me. There were several other dogs, big and small. They crowded around and sniffed me all over, but no one tried to hurt me. This new place was very strange. I was inside a house with a big box of moving pictures; there was lots of furniture with blankets where the dogs slept. There were cats staring down on me from the top of cupboards. A new lady bent down and gently stroked my face. I saw her lips move in her blurry face but heard only silence. She fed us big bowls of warm, delicious food. I tasted medicine in mine but I was so hungry I didn’t care.

When darkness fell it turned into a nightmare. The moving picture box reflected images onto the glass of the windows and it terrified me. I felt closed in and trapped. The lady kept stroking me but I was too upset to feel comfort. She let me out into the yard and I felt better, but then she made me come back inside and soon I felt the panic start again. Finally she put thick wool blankets outside on the porch and I was able to lay down and sleep.

At dawn she opened the door and left it open. I came in and waited with the other dogs for my breakfast. All that day and all through the night, the door stayed open. I would come in for a while and lay at her feet but when I got scared I’d go back outside and lay on the porch. Slowly I felt myself come back again.

The next day the lady put me into the car. This was so terrible that I crawled onto her lap and hid my face. She took me to another place. A man touched me all over; he looked at my teeth and deep down inside my ears. He moved my stiff, sore legs and when he was finished he looked at the lady and shook his head. I saw their mouths move but heard no sound. Then the man took my leash and led me to a kennel at the back. He put me into a cage and left me alone. I felt the panic rise up, I couldn’t get out and the lady with the soft hands wasn’t there to comfort me. The man came back and rubbed my ears as he stuck something sharp into my skin. He stayed and patted me until I felt so tired that I had to lay down and sleep. I woke up later but I didn’t know where I was. I started to moan and cry but I couldn’t hear any sound. My mouth hurt and I felt tight, sore places all over my body. I tasted blood in my mouth and realized that many of my teeth were gone. There were several hairless patches on me tied tight with strings. Even though I could barely stand I still felt I had to get away.
The lady came back for me and took me home but she wouldn’t let me go outside to sleep. The pain and fear crashed over top of me, I felt myself slipping far away. The lady lay down on the floor and held me as I moaned in silent agony. Throughout the night she gave me medicine to dull the pain and calm me.

When morning came I felt a little better. She gave me soft food to eat and stayed with me. That night I slept in the house all night, I didn’t need to go outside. The lady turned off the moving picture box when it got dark and I wasn’t so afraid.

Each day I feel safer. I wag my tail to greet the lady when she comes home; I do a little dance when she is preparing my food. I get very excited when she holds up the cookie box. I follow my lady everywhere. I keep my nose pressed against her leg as she moves throughout the house. Once in a while she forgets I am there and she steps on me but I don’t mind because then she kisses and fusses over me. In the evening she lays on the floor to watch the moving picture box and I snuggle close and sleep with my head against her chest. Sometimes I still feel frightened but she reaches out and touches me with soothing hands.

My life is very different now. I still remember the open fields and the warm smells of the barn. I miss following The Man as he did his daily chores. The world is still cloudy and silent but I don’t feel so alone. My bones ache less and now I roll on carpets instead of hay. The house is warm and dry and sometimes one of the dogs will lay next to me and clean my ears. I lost The Man but if I stay close to the lady, I won’t ever be lost again.



I have two young boys and a husband who I tell all about this website to. I read it daily and think of how lucky my three animals are and what wonderful things happen out at Saints. When I come back in another life I think I want to come back as your dog Carol.

Thank you for making my day!


it made me cry.
it reminds me so much of our Remy. picked him off the side of the road, took him home and bathed him, neutered him. he was the opposite about being inside- he LOVED inside. we had him about 6 months, too.


crap carol, do you always like to make us cry because i could feel the dogs pain and his emotions. wow what a story. and yes bunny we all remember our blue with his pants hanging down, was not with us too long but will always remember our sweet dog.


You have a way with words Carol. And an completely empathetic view on how the animals you care for are feeling. Great post.


different blue...this was a PB working farm border collie...he still had the warm smell of manure deep within his fur..he didn`t know how to be a `pet`dog`...i am sure he was a farmers lifelong helper.


What a gift you have of telling a story from the animal's perspective - Beautifully done. Thank you for sharing it. - and I'm so glad Frodo was found and is home again. Good going Laura! I'll see you all on Sunday.

Bunny Horne

Carol, is this our Blue with the gorgeous eyes and his pants hanging down on his back legs? I adored this dog, he was beautiful and I had moments where I thought he and I connected. If this is the same Blue I miss him terribly around the barnyard - and I miss Jack as well - and your story made me cry way the hell too much. I have the collage of photos that Jenn did for me in my living room and I can see him every single day. Your writings can bring great joy, laughter, anger and many many times tears. This is one of those tear-ful stories.