WOW...that is a lot of stuff happening to help us this month..our deepest gratitude to everyone involved at all of the various fundraisers!

i forgot to mention yesterday that we are now birdless...puck (our cockatiel,) rose and tex (our budgies)...all got a wonderful home together with a very kind and experienced bird family. this is especially great because rose and puck originally came from the same home so they get to continue on together. i know they are going to be very well cared for and happy and i am so glad they finally have a home who is well versed in providing great care and life long committment to their small family of birds!

i got up early (5am) because daphne who was still out cold... lost control of her bladder. i went flying out of bed, she just snuggled deeper under the blankets and rolled over to a drier spot. i don't feel the least bit guilty for scooping her up and adopting this absolutely wonderful dog. i figure no one else would want her because of her incontinence issues (from a damaged spine) and certainly no one else would let her sleep in their bed which is what she likes the very best! she hasn't actually peed on me in quite a long time...and last night was my fault because i fell asleep just after 9 and did not get her up to empty her bladder before we both went to sleep. anyway...she is still happily and innocently sleeping..i will wake her up in a bit when i go back in to strip off the bed....it is far too early to wake everyone up yet!

today is the day when a final decision about monty has to be made. we have an appointment just before 9 am. monty will be sedated with me at his side and the vet will assess his mouth...(it always to this point has been too painful to open his mouth without sedation and we do not want in any way to cause him pain today.) if it is getting better i will pick him up later when he wakes up and we will continue on with his current plan to maintain him. but if it is not, we won't let him wake up and i will finally have to admit our failure in helping him find a decent and pain free quality of life with his disease (monty is FIV.)

in many ways, monty has been better lately, less frequent screaming episodes when he eats. his weight and his coat are the perfect picture of health. but..i am giving him huge doses of metacam for pain and as an anti-inflammatory..enough to eventually destroy his kidneys. and i am having to keep him strictly confined in a medical pen so the only thing that he has to eat is what has all of his medicaltions in it. he has been in there for months..he cannot live in there for the rest of his life. so either the current plan is helping him heal so that he can come safely back to the house and get off of the metacam which will eventually kill him ..or...the metacam is just masking his pain and his mouth is not healing with his other meds at all...in which case, it is time to let him be free.

i don't know what the vet will say today..i am so hoping he will say that monty is finally healing but i am also afraid that when he opens his mouth, we will both see the continued devastation that at least monty hasn't felt too badly recently.

anyway..all i know for sure is..i love this sweet cat. wish us luck today..monty so deserves it.