can't actually remember what that was...i learned it from a school book 40 years ago. but i know what my theory of relativity is from living, not just reading.
when i had one child, i struggled, with 2 children i struggled, the third child came and i still struggled.
when i made $5 an hour i struggled, and at $10 i struggled, $20 an hour was a struggle..and now..well? i make a lot more than that and i am still struggling.
i struggled when i had a couple of senior animals..i struggled when i had a score of senior animals and i struggle with a whole freaking platoon of senior animals now.
and i honestly can't say that struggling felt any different before as compared to how it feels now.
i didn't really notice the increase in any struggling factor along the way..it felt just the same. i think this is because as we slowly stretch to meet each new struggling day, it just feels like a slightly bigger struggling day. we naturally grow in to it because we actually can.
there is something that i have noticed over the years when i have stretched out as far as i currently have. i have noticed when things become suddenly less ..part of me feels flappingly empty and almost useless.
in the past week with snoopy's and marg's death, with fletch off on an adventure and angel in at the vets, my evening bedtime routine struggles are a bit less. i go thru the check in, feeding and medication motions and suddenly am done before my stretched out self feels like it is supposed to be done.
what the heck? really? i am finished..that is it? aren't i supposed to be doing more for someone around here???
it feels totally weird.
so here is my theory of relativity.
we are built to relatively painlessly stretch as big as we can like a water balloon. and it is important not too put in so much water that eventually we burst. but when with caution we survive the stretch and fill up..we will suffer a bit of over stetched out loss when suddenly the water starts to leak or evaporate out.
i feel sort of floppy, flappy and empty. the good news is..angel comes home today..fletch may be coming home again too..maybe by tomorrow i will feel again like a fully filled up rescue water balloon.
maybe i will get used to this, maybe i will suck up and firm up with a relatively tiny bit less to do.
it will still be a struggle, but it will be a struggle on the downhill instead of an up slope.
it is all relative to what you live and how each day you actually get up and go.
maybe it is not so bad being a water balloon, i have learned to go with the ebb and flow and at least i am relatively floppily flexible....