Rescue Journal

there is no way to tell this terrible story without just telling it like it happened...

Carol  ·  Sep. 23, 2014

i was just pulling back into the driveway this morning when my phone rang. it was erin crying saying dionne was rushing pepper into the vets and he was dying. i asked what had happened and erin said they did not know so i turned right around and rushed down to the vets. as soon as i arrived they took me into the back treatment area and i saw pepper laying there unconscious, severely bruised around his eye and his head, i parted his hair further and i saw more deep dark bruises and puncture marks and i knew in that moment that darby and jazzy had packed up on him and beaten him into shocked unconsciousness. i did not know how two small dogs could have caused such violent damage to pepper...and i knew oscar had nothing to do with it, he is too much of a coward. that just left jazz and darby as the ones who tried to kill pepper.

pepper was close to death, the vet asked me what i wanted to do...i said save him.

i called and told the staff to get oscar out of that room and then i drove home to see jazzy and darby. i knew for sure that jazz was involved but i wasn't sure about darby and i had to know before i made any decisions. jazzy was covered in slime and blood from the attack and darby had blood smeared all around his neck.

i did not ask for permission or validation or input or discussion, this decision was mine alone to make..i booked jazz and darby in for euthanization and now they are gone. this was not a knee jerk reaction, this was not because i was mad at them...this was because i love them and i knew what their options had just become.

jazzy and darby sealed their fate when they viciously participated in a prolonged and violent attack on another animal here. it doesn't matter that they a\re both small dogs, what matters is the damage to another that they caused. i don't know why they did it, i just know that they did do it and that is one line i will not allow any animal here to cross.

my options were few, they had in one act of violence become forever unadoptable. in that one act of violence they also became a huge risk to the other animals. i tolerated their biting of humans because i could control their access to victims but short of making them both live out the rest of their lives isolated in cages, i could not keep them away forever from the other animals here and i will not consign any life to be lived in a cage.

jazzy and darby were not bad dogs but they were fucked up in the head dogs and i knew it but we tried to manage them anyway.

i spent their last half hour with them on my lap, licking my face and sharing a box of tim is the best i could do for them before taking their lives away.

all of us have had our hearts ripped right out of our chests today...all of our eyes have run constantly with tears.

we have lost jazzy and darby and we may still lose pepper and some days in rescue just suck so fucking badly that it really fucking hurts.

rest in peace darby.
rest in peace jazzy.
please pepper hang in there and don't leave us too.



Oh man I just read this. How sad and yes Carol you made the right decision. Tears are running down my face, RIP Darby and Jazz. I hope Pepper gets better. Man this has been a sucky month.

Mary Kaminski

Oh Carol, what a terrible, terrible day. A completely no-win situation for all involved. I wish I had some magical words that would make it better for everyone, but there aren't any words that can fix this. It just sucks. Hugs and prayers to everyone, especially to you, Carol, who had to make the final, hard decisions. Pepper, I hope you'll be better soon.

laura b

OMG!!! What a day from hell.I'm just sitting here in thoughts and prayers go out to all involved...


You showed love to Darby and Jazz. You hung out with them and shared Tim's with. They had people who showed love. They had problems. You did the kind thing for them. They would not have had a good life in a cage. You set them free. It sucks to have to choose. I am so sorry you had to make the choice. I hope the other dogs are ok. I will also miss Darby and his grunts after doing his business in the hay bale area. Rest in pease Jazz and Darby. Pepper hond on.


Oh God, I'm so sorry for everyone who had to deal with this heart and gut wrenching day in person. What a horrendous experience - and I'm sending a big hug to you Carol especially. You always have to make the hardest decisions, and they're always the right ones. RIP Jazzy and Darby, - and pls Pepper, pull thru. Some days just rip your heart out. So very sad tonight....


God can be so hard..I am so sorry for all who went through this experience first hand today. I have gotten to know and love Pepper and Darby cuz they hang at the barn on weekends and I will miss Darby tremendously..I am sure my hurting heart is not alone tonight.

RIP Darby and Jazzy..we will always love you

Thinking of and praying for Pepper

lynne arnason

you did what you had to do carol and i know how much it hurts what a horrible day 2 dogs gone and one clinging to life. how utterly sad you had no choice you do what you have to do. sure does not make it any easier tho. rip jazzy and darby. get better pepper. and hugs to jamie who loved jazzy so much. it all sucks.


So sorry, Carol.
And your last three lines totally sum up my feelings. I really really hope Pepper will make it. He's my little Cookie Monster.


OMG - what a horrible day at Saints. How heartbreaking for everyone involved. Sounds like there were no other options for you to take, Carol. I hope Darby and Jazzy find some peace where they are now. Praying that little Pepper makes it through. Hugs to everyone who had to deal with such an awful situation.